Welcome to Funny Bones! 

Silly jokes for kids

Everyone loves a good joke - and kids are no exception!  These fun and silly jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone.  Pop them in your child's lunch bag or tell them at parties, they are sure to bring smiles.  We add new jokes all the time so check back often.  In honor of our new Pirate Crafts books- we are starting with our favorite Pirate jokes - arrrg!  

Pirate Jokes


Why did the Pirate Captain buy a new ship??

Because it was on Sail!


Why was the marooned Pirate so clean??

Because he just washed up on shore!

How much did the Pirate pay to get his ear pierced??

A buck-an-ear!

Why couldn't the Pirate play cards on the ship??

Because he was standing on the deck!

Where did the Pirates stop for coffee?




Where did the peg leg Pirate go for breakfast?



Why do Pirates leave kids home when they travel?


Because they keep asking,                         “Arrrrr we there yet?”

What do you call the Pirate that skipped school?


Captain Hooky!

Why couldn’t the Pirate give up sailing?


Because he was hooked!

What did the Pirate say to Santa?



How does the mermaid wear her hair?



What did the Sharks eat for dinner?


Fish and Ships!

Where did the Pirate buy his new pants?



Why do seagulls fly over the sea?


Because if they flew over

the bay  they'd be bagels!

What did one Hook hand pirate say to the other??


You're looking sharp today!


Why couldn't the Pirates get into the movies??

Because it was rated Arrrrr!

What did the Pirates put on his toast??

The Jelly Roger!

What's playing at the Pirate theater??

Booty and the Beast!

Why did the crying Pirate run to his room when he stubbed his toe??

Because he had Private-tears!


What did the Mermaid ride to work?


A seahorse!


What do Pirates use at the gym?


Barrrrrr bells!

Why does it take Pirates so long to learn the alphabet?


Because they spend years                                  on sea!

Why did the Pirate cross the ocean?


To get to the other tide!

What do you call a Pirate without an eye

patch or peg leg?


A beginner!

Why did the sharks swim in salt water?


Because pepper made them sneeze!

Why did the Pirate take out the trash?


Because it was garrrrrrbage day!

Why did the Captain go to the psychiatrist?


Because his ship was a

nervous wreck!

What did the Pirates have for dinner?



How do Pirates travel on land?


By taxi crab!

What did the Peg leg Pirate say when his peg got stuck in the freezer?


Shiver me timbers!


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